Das Labyrinth der Alchemie

Nachdem ich nun mehrere Jahre verschiedene alchemistische Texte und Bilderserien studiert habe und immer noch studiere und sicher noch ein ganzes Stück studieren werde!- darunter Basilius Valentinus, Eugenius Philalethes, Raymundus Lully, Evola, Helmond, Böhme, Michael Meier's Atalanta Fugiens, Rosarium Philosophorum, Book of Lambsprinck, Aurora Consurgens, Mutus Liber etc. etc.- ganz nach dem hermetischen Leitsatz "Ora, lege, lege, lege, re-lege, labora et invenies"- kann ich zwar noch nicht behaupten, dass ich die Kunstsprache der Alchemie vollkommen durchschaut habe- fehlen mir doch noch einige ganz entscheidende initiatorische Schlüssel-, aber hatte trotz allem schon ein paar Geistesblitze, die mir etwas weiterhelfen konnten.

Es gibt manche Texte und Bücher, die ich schon mehr als dreimal gelesen habe, und wahrscheinlich so oft wiederlesen werde, bis mir das Licht dämmert.
Es heisst ja, dass wenn die "Weißung" eintritt, der Alchemist an einem Punkt angelangt ist, wo er -theoretisch- all seine Bücher verbrennen kann.
Ich nehme an, dass damit gemeint ist, dass wenn einmal ein Kontakt zu einer höheren Ebene, dem Genius oder Engel, etabliert ist, keine Führung "von außen" mehr notwendig ist.
Nun, ich stecke eben noch mitten im schwarzen Werk.
Bücher sind für mich noch vonnöten- und als Bibliophiler mehr als nötig, ja leidenschaftlich geliebt!

Ich glaube, das Prinzip, die Alchemie theoretisch zu verstehen, besteht darin, seinen Geist mit all den Informationen zu füttern, die vorhanden sind (und ich meine damit KLASSISCHE Texte und Bilderserien aus der hermetischen Tradition)- egal, ob man sie versteht oder nicht- und gleichzeitig daran zu glauben, dass das Unterbewusstsein eigene Schlussfolgerungen und Erkenntnisse formulieren wird, unabhängig vom Verstand, und diese zu einem gegebenen Zeitpunkt als Geistesblitze präsentiert.
Natürlich funktioniert das nur mit begleitender meditativer oder rituell-magischer Praxis (Ora et labora).
Und mehr als einmal hatte ich diese kleinen Geistesblitze!
Mittlerweilen bin ich schon so an diese Art theoretischer Arbeit gewöhnt, dass ich mir denke: je unverständlicher und verstiegener solch ein Text, umso besser!
Mit einer fast schon perversen Lust stürze ich mich auf die verwirrendsten Traktate.
Heisst es nicht, dass je unverständlicher die Adepten über ihre große Kunst geschrieben haben, umso klarer sie sich ausgedrückt haben?
Gerade alchemistische Bilderserien wie die "Atalanta Fugiens" von Michael Meier transportieren nicht selten universale Wahrheiten.
Nun sind universale Wahrheiten oft paradox, und erscheinen dem Verstand als unlogisch, und Logik ist eben nur ein überlebensnotwendiges Werkzeug unseres Verstandes, dem Vermittler zwischen dem höheren Bewusstsein und der instinkthaften Natur.
Auch in den östlichen Traditionen gibt es Methoden, den Verstand und die Logik auszutricksen, um an ein höheres Verständnis zu gelangen- man denke nur an die berühmten Zen-Koans.

Ich erinnere mich aber noch genau an meine ersten Reaktionen, als ich Bücher wie "Die entschleierte Alchemie" von Johannes von Helmond, oder "Die hermetische Tradition" von Julius Evola gelesen habe.
Das erste Mal Helmond ist bestimmt 7 Jahre her, und ich habe verächtlich darüber gelacht!
Nun, nach mehrmaligem Lesen, ist es ein wahrer Brunnen der Weisheit für mich geworden.
Beim erstmaligen Lesen von Evolas Meisterwerk hätte ich das Buch am liebsten erzürnt an die Wand geschleudert, oder gleich aus dem Fenster.
Aber ich habe gelernt, dass theoretisches Verständnis mit persönlicher Reife und Entwicklung wächst.
Viele dieser alchemistischen Bücher kommen wir nach Jahren des Wiederlesens vor, als hätte ich sie niemals zuvor gelesen.

Die Kunstsprache und Bilderwelt der Alchemie ist ein Labyrinth aus Allegorien, Fabeln und Symbolen.
Nicht selten wird innerhalb eines Textes ein Feuer als Wasser und dann wieder als Salz bezeichnet, oder Schwefel als Merkur und Merkur als Schwefel oder Salz.
Alleine für den Merkur gibt es wahrscheinlich hunderte von Bezeichnungen, die sich ähnlich sind oder widersprechen.
Meine Vermutung ist auch, dass oft Wölfe, Löwen, Drachen oder Geier ein- und dasselbe Ding bezeichnen.
Auch, dass manchmal z.B. Putrefaktion, Calcination und Sublimation nur technische Ausdrücke für ein- und dieselbe Operation sind.
Abgesehen von der Tatsache, dass viele alchemistische Autoren das Geheimnis extra verschlüsselten und die verschiedenen Ausdrücke und Abfolgen der Prozesse und Kunstkniffe vertauschten etc., um den Profanen in die Irre zu führen, und den wahren Suchenden zu weiterer persönlicher Forschung und Arbeit zu ermutigen, ist ein wichtiges Prinzip, das in diesen Texten steckt, das Prinzip der Erziehung des Bewusstseins zu einem höheren Verständnis.

Letzten Endes glaube ich, dass es nur eine Wahrheit, ein Licht, und ein Geheimnis, ein Arcana Arcanorum gibt, aber dieses Geheimnis so einfach und gleichzeitig gewaltig ist, dass es dem Verstand nur in Allegorien mitgeteilt werden kann, und auch nur in kleinen Häppchen.
Das Bewusstein muss schrittweise an das Geheimnis gewöhnt werden.
Dafür dient die Kabbala, die Magie und die hermetischen Allegorien. Sie bereiten das Bewusstsein graduell darauf vor, irgendwann das ganze Geheimnis erfassen zu können.
Und ist es dann erfasst, ist das Licht im Bewusstsein in seiner vollen Glorie gedämmert, verhindert es seine wesenseigene Natur, dass es klar und direkt, d.h. ohne Symbol oder Allegorie, ausgedrückt werden kann.
Deshalb: Isis schützt sich selbst!

Oculator Abis!
S.S.N.S.

Golden Dawn als eine archaische Form der Psychoanalyse

Als ich das erste Mal auf der Couch meines Psychoanalytikers lag, hatte ich sofort ein Schlüsselerlebnis.
Mir war sofort klar, warum man liegt und wieso der Analytiker nur als Stimme hinter Deinem Kopf wahrnehmbar ist.
Es hatte etwas extrem beruhigendes zu wissen, dass da eine Stimme aus dem Off ganze zwei oder drei Stunden in der Woche nur dafür da zu sein scheint, sich um Dich und Deine Probleme und Sorgen zu kümmern.
Das weckte Assoziationen von einem Über-Papa und dem lieben Gott, der sanft zu Dir spricht, und Dir vor allem auch zuhört.
Ich ahnte auch, dass irgendwann und unweigerlich genau diese Stimme ganz ätzend und unausstehlich werden wird, dass dieser Punkt kommt, und dass das dann ein Zeichen ist, dass die psychologische Übertragung in vollem Gange und erfolgreich ist. Der Garten Eden fällt unweigerlich und die Hydra wird ihre hässlichen Kopfe in der dunklen Nacht erheben und dies ist gut, denn es ist die notwendige Bedingung, damit Eden sich zu seiner ursprünglichen, ja noch reineren Glorie erheben kann.

Ich hatte das Gefühl, ich verstehe den Prozess gleich von der ersten Stunde an so gut und instinktiv, weil ich ihn kenne. Oft dachte ich, dass der Prozess, den man im Äußeren Orden des Golden Dawn durchläuft, nichts anderes ist als eine archaische Form der Psychotherapie.
Die Übertragung zwischen Analytiker und Patient in einem psychoanalytischen Prozess ist der Schlüssel zum Verständnis des eigenen Wesens.
Die Übertragung, die zwischen dem initiierenden Hierophanten und seinem Kandidaten geschieht hat dasselbe Wirkprinzip, doch dockt sich direkt an der feinstofflichen Matrix an.
Abgesehen davon hat man der Reformation des Ordens im Jahr 1999 zu verdanken, dass man den initiatorischen Effekt noch verstärken und verfeinern kann und damit zu einem noch umfassenderen Wissen über das eigene Wesen gelangen kann, indem man systematisch und entsprechend den Graden bis 5=6 alle Elemente, Planeten und Sternzeichen invozieren und damit analog die Persönlichkeit in 24 grobe Teile zerlegen und betrachten kann.
Invoziere dreimal Widder mit vollem Herzen und ganzer Kraft, und Du weisst genau, welchem Anteil deiner Persönlichkeit diese Kraft entspricht, da Dir in den folgenden Wochen entsprechende Situationen widerfahren werden.

Kurzum: Ich glaube, dass die Ausbildung, die man im Golden Dawn durchläuft, das Verständnis und den emotionalen Zugang zu einem psychoanalytischen Verfahren extrem erleichtert und dass gleichzeitig der analytische Prozess das Verständnis um die magisch-initiatorischen Effekte und Mechaniken extrem vertiefen kann.

Es grüßt,
Frater Leise

The Woman of Revelation

I was asked by somebody if i think that the Golden Dawn is a luciferian path.
Of course, i said no, and i had to laugh, because magical orders that promote a so-called luciferian path simply teach black magic, or work with unbalanced forces, the back side of the tree and the goetia etc.
But then this man insisted on the simple etymology of the word Lucifer as Light-Bearer and that the initiate of the Golden Dawn invokes LVX, Light, and works with this Light and therefore can be seen as a Light-Bearer.
And this brought me to something that i was thinking about many weeks now, for a long time not knowing how to formulate it right.

Of course every true alchemist loves God.
The love for God, His Wisdom and His Creation i believe is pre-requisite for any serious alchemical work.
By the way, without being true christian in heart, you would have not been allowed to the famous german Gold- und Rosenkreuz-Order.
This should clear away the notion of black magic in the term "luciferian".

But on the other hand, the brothers of the Rose-Cross as well as magicians and alchemists of the west were not seldomnly famous for their many social contacts.
Withdrawal from the outer world is never propagandised at this path, or maybe only at rare occassions as requisite for certain operations in a limited time frame.
Moreover, chastity or physical ascetism is not required as well to have success in magic. A healthy attitude towards sexuality prevents the student from becoming obsessed by his own complexes instead of attaining to his highest potential, and in regards to semiluxury food moderation and discernment is the key.
Even Jesus drank wine every day and loved to have many people around him, people of every kind, even a "whore".

I once had the intuition that the alchemist, instead of refraining from the material, by his ascent on the Mount of Abiegnus in reality descends deep down into the Materia- in order to give Divinity back to Her, that what she has lost at the Fall in Eden. This is also in line with the antinominan attitudes in sabbatean and especially frankist movements in the kabbalistic traditions.

The magician does channel Light into his/her sphere, and this Light i believe not only inflames our beings, but the beings that are around and with us also. I think this happens, on a subtle level, without you having any intention to do so.
It often happened that friends who have no clue of or interest in what i do spiritually and magically told me of experiences in their lives that corresponded with the element i was initiated in at that time and i certainly know that not all of these coincidences just happened because i had manipulated my focus...
When two people meet in a room, their spheres automatically mix to a certain extent.
What much more mingling of subtle energies when two people make Love!
Therefore being a magician or theurgist maybe means to propel evolution also.

More than one time i had the slightly heretic and, alas, megalomaniac thought that my energetic evolution maybe is only one side of the coin.

I had to think about St. John's Apocalypse.
The woman that appears, clad with the Sun and the Moon under her feet, and crowned with twelve Stars.
Its Isis, the goddess of Magic;
the four beasts about the throne, the presidents of the forces of the elements;
the book of the seven seals and the lamb in the midst of the throne and four beasts and elders...

The thought of mine was, and i urge you to instead of taking this too serious to take it with a certain wink:
maybe the magicians of the Golden Dawn are just like marionettes of the Divine that call down the forces of the macrocosm into their microcosmic spheres, believing that they unite with God internally, which may be true, but at the same time, and more important, they create the Kingdown of God on the whole globe by accelerating the collective evolution. Breaking the seven seals and speeding up a process for mankind and our planet in general.

Believe me or not, i undertake speculations like this mostly for personal entertainment. My ascendant sign is Pisces, therefore i have the strong inclination to let my fantasy drift in any possible direction and at any given time....but the outcome of it i do often take with a good pinch of salt.


Sincerely,
the Son of Gamuret

The Chymical Wedding, II

When Christian, in the second chapter of "Die chymische Hochzeit des Christian Rosencreutz", arrives at the castle where the (al)chymical wedding takes place, he has to pass through three portals.
At every portal he meets a guardian, at every portal he has to give something, but he also receives something in reward.
Written over the first portal he reads "Procul hinc, procul ite Prophani!", which is the latin version of "Hekas, hekas, este bebeloi!", the call of the Kerux in the Neophyte ceremony.
At this point it is clear that, whatever will take place in the castle, is reserved for initiates only.
And that Christian already is an initiate is clear when we read at the beginning of the first chapter that he sits down, like every evening, to engage in humble prayer and to create an undefiled "easter lamb" in his heart. He also tells us that "the Father of Light has shown him not only few of his mysteries so far".

At the portal, Chrisitan is asked to buy a "sign".
He has no money with him, so he tells the guardian to take whatever he likes.
The guardian takes a small bottle of WATER that Christian carries in his bag.
He then receives a golden coin with the letters S.C. on it.
It is not particularly said that this sign is a coin, but i always thought it to be exactly that. There is this old german word "Denkpfennig", which can be a coin that has engravings to remember you of something or to identify yourself before a higher instance.
The coin Christian gets is a perfect symbol for every initiation or grade you receive.
Remember that coins are attributed to pentacles and the element of Earth.
This means that something has manifested, or came down.
It is also a symbol for positive acknowledgment for what you have achieved.
In the sense that denkpfennige were nominal fees for your landlord in medieval times this coin in this novel can be compared to the effect of the elemental initiations in the Outer Order of the Golden Dawn as some kind of astral passports for the astral planes in question.

For the meanings of the letter S.C. Johann Valentin Andreae gives different possible interpretations in his footnotes to his first edition.
One of them is "Signum Crucis".
This, as well as Christians formal verbal introduction to the first guardian as Christian, the "Brother of the Red Rose Cross", delineates him as not only an initiate, but an an adept of the inner mysteries.
Andrea gives more alternatives like "Spes Caritas" (hope and love), but this is not the point i was thinking about-
Christian will receive more coins with letters on it, passing signs for the portals.
The second coin has the letters S.M., the third S.P.N.
Apart from that it is good mental training to cabbalise the meanings of these letters, by gematria or finding the yetziratic attributions, i know that when i was reading that, i had to think about what the practising magician or theurgist is doing with words and letters.
For the profane, Adonai is just a hebrew word meaning Lord and Ararita is just an acronym out of 7 hebrew words.
But by constant magical practise and faith in God and your magic you breath ever more life into these words.
You make them meaningful and thereby vibrant with power and life.
You turn simple words into effective magical agents.
There existed whole magical schools who only practised energising and vitalising certain words or names of power in order to attain illumination.

Over the second portal Christian reads "Date et dabitur vobis!" (Give and you will receive). The path of initiation always means that you have to invest a certain amount or manifestation of energy into something to be rewarded, at least time, discipline and faith.
Think of the five red cords and tassels on the Banner of the East symbolizing divine self-renunciation: the adept has to give up his illusion of being separate from the All.

At the second portal there is a wild lion that is tamed by the second guardian.
Very simplistic, the lion can be seen as a symbol for tremendous energy, or LVX, or the magical agent per se, on the human level as the force of Kundalini.
Christian buys the second sign with S.M. ("Sal Menstrualis", Salt of Purification, or "Studio Merentis", to the study of the Most Worthy) on it, by giving the guardian the SALT he has with him.
I find it curious that he first gives water, and than salt.
Iam lacking of deeper understanding of the alchemical principles so far, but am naive enough to interpret this in terms of that you can work on your energetic bodies (salt) by working on your consciousness (water) and not the other way around.

He then hurries to the third and last portal before the entrance.
He slips through it just before it is closed- he seems to be the last one that comes through it (Matthew 19,30-;-))

This time, he does not have to give anything in order to get the last sign.
But instead, by slipping through the closing gate in the last second, he looses a piece of his cloth that got tucked into the gate.
Clothes are a symbol for personality or persona in the sense of identity or "outer mask".
This is a re-affirmation of the necessity to overcome that which is called the flaw of seperateness.

He then sees that on one side of the portal is a happy picture with the word "Congratulator" over it, on the other side is a sad face with the word "Condoleo".
For me, this is the most excellent because most concise definition of the effect of magical initiations in general.

It has happened to me more than once that i at the one hand had reason to rejoice, but on the other hand, sometimes on a material or "profane" level experienced challenges. Sometimes these two events were so closely timed that it cannot be held as by chance. "By chance" does rarely exist for a magician.

Iam not the guy who builds a house in 1=10, marries in 3=8 and has success in 4=7.
Thats why i so deeply sympathise and feel a great empathy with this protagonist called Christian.
Throughout the book, he is a victim of mocking and scorn.
It already starts at his way to the castle, when he looses his bread for cheeky birds, and continues at the portal when he is the last one to come in and looses a bit of his cloth, and culminates in the (mostly) funny mockeries his brethren and masters play on him.
But at the end, he will receive the greatest gift.

Sexuality, again

Inspired by one comment on H. Frater A.I.T.s excellent blog, i feel inclined again to share some thoughts about sexuality.
To my astonishement, i often come across students asking me how to behave sexually and asking about my attitude towards this issue.
This is a sign that the general attitude towards sexuality in our culture and civilisation is in a deep misery.
Although it seems as if we are living in an elightened, modern and progressive time, i think nothing has changed since medieval times- maybe it has changed to the worse...
Sex is everywhere in mass media- in movies, real life documentaries, advertisements, internet, porn is free for everyone....But for what? Sex still has its "dirty" and sinful connotations.
But i say: There is nothing whatsoever dirty about sex- if its straight, bi- or homosexual. As long as two adults are involved and they are in perfect agreement.
Its just the crooked attitude of christianity that left the impression of sex as being dirty and sinful on our collective subconsciousness- even if we are not christian- we live in this culture and are impregnated by its moral standards and crooked ethics.
Maybe iam in a better position to talk about this issue because iam gay and from very early on i had to make my own thoughts about what is normal or sinful and what not. Even today i find myself often confronted with people thinking or expressing in some way or another that iam no "real man". Thats bullshit. I think i have much more right to call myself a real man than many other straight guys who never questioned their behaviour.
And my advise is: Try to root out all notions of sex as being dirty or sinful from your consciousness. This is not your idea.
Sex is nothing to be ashamed of.
Sex is holy and an expression of the holy will to UNITE.
Sex is the same drive as the will to unite with your Higher Soul, only expressed on a lower arc.
Nobody has to feel ashamed or feel like a sinner only because he enjoys having sex with somebody or him/herself.
Nobody has to "sublimate" his sexual feelings and orgasms.
Orgasms are JOY and i truly believe that God wants his children to experience JOY.
Its not God who will judge you for having joy.
Its the false and crooked attitudes and ideas planted in our subconsiousness that make us feel at odds with sexuality- and these false ideas and notions simply have to be rooted out and cleansed.

The Olympic Spirits

Iam investigating into the nature of the olympic spirits right now and find it quite fascinating.
Not much has been said in the traditional Golden Dawn papers about them, except that the candidate receives their sigils and planetary attributions at some point in the Outer Order.
Last weekend, when initiating a candidate into the certain grade where this diagram is displayed, i finally felt its time to do a little magical research.
One only has to do the planetary invocation at the right time (and a shortened version of a Greater Invoking Ritual will even suffice), and use the sigil as skrying device.
To my astonishement, i found out that these spirits are very easy accessible and that they have distinct functions in the universe in general, and in nature and human life in particular.
I dont want to reveal what i have seen on the astral, because i would like to know if other magicians maybe have similar insights, and it would be great to compare.

Summa scientia nihil scire,
Fra. L.

Gebet

"Ich bin Nichts in mir und ich Selbst in Dir,
und diese Selbstheit existiert von Anbeginn zu Anbeginn.
Du bist der goldene Magnetstein meiner Liebe,
das Eine Licht, die Eine Wahrheit und das Eine Leben.
Du bist der All-Eine, gekrönt, funkelnd und mit Macht beladen.
Und ich bin machtlos in mir, weil befleckt vom Makel des Geteilt-Seins.
Komm herbei als starkes und unsterbliches Feuer!
Dein Antlitz ist Weite, Deine Schwingen Unermesslichkeit.
Auf den geflügelten Hengsten der Morgenröte reitest Du von Haus zu Haus
und ich erwarte Dich, wie eine Jungfrau ihren Bräutigam.
Komm herbei und verschlinge mich mit dem Feuer Deiner Liebe,
auf dass ich mich mit der Selbstheit vereinigen kann, die in Dir ist,
und die ich immer war und immer sein werde. Amen."

(C)R.N.

Magic and the romance of adventure

Recently i did reflect much on what i have experienced throughout my last seven years as student of the hermetic sciences.
It did this not on purpose, rather it came naturally, like many things that fit to the actual level of attainment.

Apart from many insights on my own psychic make-up, by seeing how i relate to and function in the world, sometimes coming even as superb soberings and disentchantments when detecting my own weaknesses, signs of low self-esteem and inferiority complexes and the like, i found out that there were innumerous highlights in my practise that spurred me on on my path. Even highlights that had some very funny aspects.

For example, i remember coming to my working place, a bookshop, one day after one of my first invocations of elemental Earth, being a fresh-baked Juniorus.
The first thing my boss did when he saw me on that day was giving me a package of incense sticks a guy from india had left in the bookshop for me the day before.
Till now i dont know who this guy was, and in all the 9 years working at this place i also cant remember anyone leaving me incense sticks for a present.
But i will never forget that these incense sticks had "Lily of the Valley"-scent!

Or then there was this impressive revelation when i did pathworking once as a Neophyte, a specific variation that my Hierophant had taught me.
I was travelling to Gimel, the High Priestess, and completely out of a sudden, in the twinkling of an eye, i had a vision of my Holy Guardian Angel.
Words cannot describe the bliss and ecstasy i bathed in, after seeing Him clothed as our planet Earth, suddenly catching Fire.
When i look at this special event now...i tend to think that this could have been the moment when the holy trouble started LOL.

I will also not forget the skrying into the plane of Earth when i was working for 2 weeks in Munich, under limited conditions in a foreign place.
There, when travelling in the Spirit Vision, i found out that the Watchtowers do really exist, at the far corners of the elemental plane. I saw a huge tower of stone on a vast and deserted, rocky plane. The atmosphere was full of sulphurous fumes and heaviness. I think i met an Angel that shaped himself out of the bricks of the Tower, and i realized that every brick or stone of this Tower is an Angel.

One of the strangest memories i have was when i was Theoricus, travelling to Tunisia on my own. From the beginning, i had planned this trip to be some sort of magical retirement, and like always, magic did not fail to impress me.
I love doing magic under foreign circumstances and limited conditions.
This always adds a special flair of adventure and romance.
I remember invoking Libra for the first time in my hotel room, at a time when Libra was rising in the East, being aspected very good, and i think i caught the tattvic tide of Air as well.
I had a one to one meter space between my bed and the commode, which served as the altar.
The Sun was nearly setting over the balcony, and i could see the sea.
After having traced the second pentagram in the south, i could see the room around me transform in a few seconds, like when you put a filter over a movie that only highlights green and red colours, also a lot of soft focus lens, and my aestethic sense was trembling in bliss.
To be short: it was a psychedelic experience, something i thought the mind always be able to produce without the aid of any substance, just by magical exaltation!
After the ritual i went down to the hotel foyer to meet with an older woman i had learned to know at the breakfast table a few days before. I had spent long walks and good conversation with her along the beach and now we wanted to take a last drink, letting the day settle.
After an hour she freaked out on me completely and out of no logical reasons!
She blamed me being frightening in my black clothes and pale skin, and she made no use of flattery when she said that i look like a living corpse, and went on to question my ethics
by considering what i had told her about my plan for life. We departed with really strange faces, and the rest of the week i would not sit with her at the breakfast table anymore, only seeing her throwing mischievious glances at me from the other corner of the room.
By the way, she was Libra. And i have Uranus in Libra, together with Pluto in Scorpio in my seventh house!

At one occassion, when i was Philosophus, i simply wanted to know it. It was a summer night, and i was sitting with friends in a backyard that a close friend of mine had turned into a little green paradise. We had made a fire in the midst of the place, and the 4 of us watched the play of the tongues of the flames in relative silence.
Then it came over me, and i did invoke astrally the forces of elemental Fire, by first banishing astrally around the place, using an improvised invocation of my Angel, and putting on the Godform of Horus, and tracing one pentagram and sigil and calling on the hierarchy. I especially called the salamanders to visible appearance, and i truly wanted it, out of curiosity and, well, fun.
Believe it or not, it was a matter of some two or three minutes and my friends did not notice anything at all. I just seemed to stare into the fire, saying nothing for some time.
Right after it, when collecting myself again in just being with my friends, i saw a small subtle and green shadow emerge out of the Fire, but thought it to be just an optical reaction.
We were talking about this and that till my friend N. suddenly prompted us all to look at the funny lizard in the fire.
I could hardly believe my eyes!
One of the biggest wooden logs in the metallic tub that served as fireplace had, with the help of Fire, transformed into a lizard of 20 centimeters length, with sparkling combs and gills, and a distinct, amphibian mouth out of which came a burst of fire in regular intervals!
Everbody saw it clearly and had to laugh, and i, secretly, thanked God and the forces of Fire and released them with banishings and blessings!

Iam sure i would have more like this on my mind, but its late now, and when being creative i usually dont have the patience to work on entries longer than at the first record, and, OH! this was a hot and long summer day, so.....

Khabs am Pekht,
L.e.N.e.

Solve et Coagula

Yesterday, after a long brooding over alchemical texts and these emblems, I came to the thought that the two modes of working in Alchemy that are described as "Solve et Coagula" could not only be understood as two successive phases of the Work, but instead as happening at the same time.
The King on this emblem is the consciousness of the Adept, and the sea in which it is drowning is a symbol for the unconsciousness and its dissolving powers or also for an alchemical agent that has great dissolving qualitites, but of which i do not know anything now.
This process of dissolution is the "Solve" part of the formula. It frees the consciousness from the bonds of the body, and may be a kind of philosophick death.

On this picture we see an Egg as the central symbol, next to a fireplace and a Man holding a sword in his hands.
The philosophick Egg is a symbol for the energetic body of the Adept.
With the use of fire one can boil the egg, and make it solid.
In our tradition we use magical energy, known as L.V.X., to feed the energetic bodies of the aspirant. The magician learns to generate and transmit ever more magical energy through his body, and this energy in turn helps to make the energetic bodies of the magician ever more solid and stable.
The source of L.V.X. is akin to a celestial, mighty Fire, that is our Sun, the giver and dispenser of Light and Life on our earth.
The sword is a symbol for Air, and to the magical element of Air belong all faculties of the reasoning mind.
All magic and energetic transformation happens with the use of our minds, as it is said by the Alchemists that the Work is done by the aid of Mercury alone, and Mercury is a symbol for self-consciousness and reasoning abilities.
So this emblem is a symbol for the "Coagula" part of the process. The volatile principles are made solid and fix, an energetic vessel is created, just like a potter who uses clay to form vessels.


When the perception is freed from its physical limitations, when the Adept experiences a philosophick Death, or when his Mercury begins to fly, the bonds that attach or fix the consciousness to the body are volatized, and at the other hand (and maybe at the same time, but i could easily be on the wrong track here), by the influx of celestial essences that Mercury carries with him on his flight back to the body, the energetic bodies of the Adept reach the highest maximum of solidity.
Besides the ability to maintain some sort of identity (a quality that is trained on the dream level i guess), the process of becoming freed from the physical limitations requires, as i understand it, a great deal of emotional control. I have read more than one time that at the moment of this separation (which is a union with the All-One) the greatest danger arises when the Adept is not able to constrain or control his feelings. He could be too easily carried away by a wave of divine ecstasy and put himself in risk to die.


L.e.N.e.

The Athanor

On the first emblem of Atalanta Fugiens you can see a human body with an infant in his belly.
The peculiar thing about this human body is that it generates fumes out of his head and hands.
Without an internal fire, there could be no fume.
The alchemical athanor is the human body, which produces the secret fire of the Work.
The foetus in the belly is a symbol for the infant Sulphur, the seed of Soul.

L.e.N.e.

The First Matter

I had to think about this alchemical emblem from Michael Maiers "Atalanta Fugiens" lately.
I tried to interpret this on my own for many times, and knowing that although i do not yet possess the initiatic keys to unlock the mysteries of Alchemy in its whole, i think its nonetheless good to draw conclusions and to share them, even if i may be on the wrong track.

This emblem is connected with the saying that the Stone is everywhere, is omnipresent, its there for everyone, and many do dismiss it as worthless. Its also said that children play with it in the streets.
On this picture you can see cubical stones in the air, in the water, and on the earthen ground.
Therefore, the Stone must be something that is closely connected with the alchemical elements, and especially not with one element but the sum of them all.
Now, the first premise to work alchemy is the discovery of the First Matter.
Without having discovered the First Matter properly, an Alchemist is not able to get the Great Work started.
I believe that the First Matter in turn is closely connected to the Quintessence (which is another term for alchemical Spirit, Azoth or Akasha).
It is also said that the quintessence is not to be confused with the totality or synthesis of the elements, and their interplay and mixing, but rather its understood as generating the elements, as being the principal source of them.
This reminds me of the function of our apparatus of perception, of which our senses are the clients.
By studying the conclusions of modern brainresearch, we find out that reality as we perceive it, with material objects inclusive our bodies as being solid and the material world as something that does exist objectively outside ourselves, is just the interpretation of our perception apparatus, our brain. There is no objective universe as we perceive it.
Its just the brain that interprets the world around us as being a material universe with us as being separately functioning individuals in it.
There i see a close parallel to the nature of the Quintessence.
The quintessence is not the synthesis of the elements, but rather the quintessence is the generator and source of the elements.
Or to put it another way:
Our Quintessence (the nature of our mind) coagulates the impulses that flow through our senses into objective reality.
Reality in turn is perceived as something that exists outside of us, with us being its product, but in truth reality (the perception of a solid materiality) is born out of the Quintessence, our mind.
The perception of reality as we know it is due to the function of consciousness in our body.

I believe to discover the First Matter means to see and experience the world as it really is.
Here, the kabbalistic scheme is of great help to intellectually grasp this idea.
According to the kabbalistic dogma, the material Universe (Malkuth) is just the most condensed form of an all-pervading, omnipresent energy: Light.
The source of this Ain Soph Auor, this limitless ocean of Light, is God. God is the All-One, and as the Emerald Tablet of Hermes puts it: All things are from One, by the contemplation of One, so from this One Thing come all things by adaption.
So, a premise to discover the First Matter could be the realisation that our Quintessence is the generator of material reality and binds us to the perception of being separate from the One.
The actual discovery of the First Matter enables us to be freed from this perception, to clear the mind from the illusion that we are separate.
Would the mind be freed from its physical limitations, we would be able to perceive the Universe as it really is: an ocean of Light in varying degrees of vibration.

Therefore i think that the whole Outer Order process of the Golden Dawn enables the hermetic student to discover the First Matter, and therefore truly is a preparation for hermetic Alchemy, by practically studying and experiencing the effects of the alchemical elements, the planets and signs and the alchemical principles, which are different modes of vibrations of the One.
This leads to find out about the true nature of Spirit, which is the Quintessence, and often termed as Chaos and Emptiness at once.
I believe that the discovery of the First Matter to be not only an intellectual quest, but rather an impressing spiritual experience which may correspond to the Knowledge of the Holy Guardian Angel.
The Angel is the Divine Spark that is latent in every human being, and it is the link to the All-One or God, just like Jesus said that nobody reaches the Father than through him.
The Angel tears down the illusion of being separate from this Divine Core.
This may lead to the experience that the whole universe is truly born out of the One and that the One is our intrinsic nature, a fact that the Rose Cross (Spirit nailed to the cross of the elements) in the middle of the emblem hints at.


L.e.N.e.

Admission Badges of the Outer Order

Recently I had a thought about the admission badges of the Outer Order grades, the crosses and pyramids in particular, although this idea might be a bit half-baked till now.
I just thought that they tell the story of the growth of Soul.
For example, when entering the Sephira of Malkuth at 1=10, the candidate holds the Fylfot Cross in his hand.
Because of its dynamic shape, this Fylfot Cross (or Swastika) reminded me of the Divine Spark that is latent in every being- the "Prima Materia" of Soul or energetic bodies that have to be evolved during the initiatory process, and this Spark is located deep inside our physical bodies, which fits nicely to 1=10.
When entering the Path of Tav in 2=9 this Cross has changed into the solid greek cubical Cross, that is to say by receiving the purifications and consecrations of the kerubic forces of the Astral Sphere the aforementioned Divine Spark will become more solid.
It then changes into a tetrahedron at the Path of Shin in 3=8, or into a pyramid at the Path of Tzaddi in 4=7.
Amongst other things, the pyramid can be seen as a symbol for the Soul that has become ever more solid and at the same time receptive for angelic and divine forces, see also the truncated pyramids that are used as devices for sub-elemental enochian skryings.
Finally, at the Path of Peh in 4=7, the last official path to traverse in the Outer Order, you have the Sephirotic Cross of 10 squares, with the 10 Sephiroth assigned to each square in logical order, a perfect symbol for the Soul in balance and equilibrium.

Practise of the Divine Presence

During the last weeks i have occassionally experimented with a technique that Regardie once published in his genuine "12 Steps to Spiritual Enlightenment", namely the "Practise of the Presence Divine".
The procedure is to first relax the body to its greatest extent, and then to imagine that the skin, the muscles, the flesh, bones, brain and inner organs are consisting of billions of pores that enable the atmosphere to rush through every second.
When this is achieved, and usually this will take some practise, the whole body should feel like a sponge, that is not solid or fix, but more like an organism of myriads of vibrating cells loosely bound together and able to absorb the whole atmosphere around you.
The idea behind this exercise is that God is Life-Power and that this Life-Power is distributed through and pervading all the Universe, without boundaries, sustaining every atom of the universe, God is everywhere and everything, the One-All----and with Air as its vehicle, which is the clue of this exercise.
Because when having achieved this sponge-like feeling, you should imagine the Air around you as God, sustaining and pervading the whole universe.
I amplified this imagination by visualising that iam located in the center of a universe filled with brilliant white light or LVX, and that by exhaling and inhaling i direct this God-Power through all my body, filling every cell and atom with its vibrant energy.
And i was amazed about the effects of this exercise!
On one occasion i really FELT that our Universe is a vibrant and living and intelligent organism, a powerful One-All, and this experience came with such a greatness and vastness that it simply cant be described with words.
This exercise also fits very good in group-settings with Temple work, and the Opening of the Temple in 2=9 is just perfect for it. Then you can imagine that the Divine Breath is transmitted from Kether down the Middle Pillar and coming from the East into your Temple.
A preliminary invocation ritual of Pentagram of Air or Spirit fits also very well.

One of my favorite dreams this year

I dreamt that iam at my parents house, at night.
I stand with a friend at the balcony, looking at the roofs of the houses in the village.
The moon stands in full brightness at the sky above and iam amazed by its sheer beauty.
Then suddenly, the moon begins to fall onto the earth.
My reaction is panic. I say: Oh no, it will fall onto the earth and destroy everything!
I expect a big explosion, but to my astonishement there is no crashing sound, but instead it hall happens without noise. It falls softly, and hits a spot in the village hidden from our sight.
When it hits the earth, i notice a silent explosion of soft and warm silvery light. This light fills everything and is warm and gentle and seductive somehow and therefore my panic turns into excitement.
I say to my companion: Come on, lets go to the place where the moon crashed in.
So we go through the village and come to a mountain, where i suppose it to be.
I look towards the top of the mountain and there i see a huge female giant, maybe 10 to 20 meters life-size.
She is about to crawl down the mountain, towards us.
My reaction is panic again and i urge my friend to hide with me from her.
So we climb into a sandbox and hide behind a plank of wood, we are really small now, like little children.
I hear the giant coming near, with big steps that make a thundering sound.
Iam totally scared and try to make myself even smaller behind the plank of wood.
But then i notice that the giant is already in front of us, hidden from our sight behind the plank.
She starts to speak to us in a very gentle, soft and comforting voice and tells us that we do not have to scared, that everything is okay, and that we are safe and have to climb out of the sandbox to welcome her.
So, for the second time in this dream my panic changes into amazement and joy, and i do as she has told me.
Then there was something i dont remember anymore, but i remember that in the last sequence of this dream the female giant has introduced us to the company of many other giants.

L.e.N.e.

Elementary versus Zodiacal Magic

I found out that the repeated performance of the Supreme Invoking Ritual of the Pentagram on the elemental level (that is invoking the combined forces of all five elements) creates some sort of tumult at everyday life, and that the spiritual task is to stay calm and balanced, no matter what problems arise.
But by invoking the combined forces of the Zodiac via the Pentagram ritual i create some sort of tumult in my inner life, and the task is to get rid of psychic ballast, a psychic clearing out of overcome attitudes and habits.
I can tell that the first performances of the elementary SIRP created much tumult! For example, i had water damages at my apartment, suffered loss of family members, fell unfulfilled in love, had trouble at work etc etc.
But by repeatedly performing it i found out that the tumult turned to peace again, up to the point where i did not notice any outside changes anymore. This i took as a sign that the elements are balanced in my sphere to a certain sufficient extent, at least at the grade level iam in.
This whole elementary balancing process took around 3 months of my current Portal grade.
In these 3 months i have performed the SIRP ca. 10 times, alternately with connotation on the elemental hierarchy and Spirit itself.
I dont know if it would have taken longer if i would not have started with occasional SIRPs and Opening of Watchtowers already at the Theoricus level- mostly due to a burning curiosity how it is like.
Now iam in the process of zodiacal balancing, and found out that, just like with ordinary zodiacal invocations, there is not so much happening in the outer world, but instead on the inner and emotional and psychic level.
May my Angel guide me through this delicate phase (-and hopefully a good psychotherapist i can trust)!

Yours,
L.e.N.e.

The Supreme Invoking Ritual of the Zodiac and Assumption of God-Forms

In order to prepare for the performance of the Supreme Invoking Ritual of the Zodiac, where the magician invokes the forces of every zodiacal sign in one session, i decided to train myself by first invoking all the cardinal, then the kerubic and finally the mutable signs, that is invoking the Quadruplicities.
I found out that this is also a perfect exercise for creating the respective God-Forms, seeing that in each of the three sessions the colors of the Godforms complement each other at the opposite direction of the Temple, which made it quite simple to create the astral hall.
For example, for the invocation of the cardinal signs we have Aries with red at the East and Libra with green at the West, and Capricorn with blue-violet at the South and Cancer with yellow-orange at the North.
The creation of the God-Forms is an integral part of every ritual invocation and i noticed that the more precise and patient i work on this part, the better is the outcome of the whole ritual.
I will give an example how i proceed.
After the introductory banishings, purification and consecrations and after having invoked the Highest Divine Force with as much devotion and emotion as possible, i sit down at the Altar, relax my body and close my eyes.
I imagine the room where i work in vanishing in a silvery-white mist, till everything is filled with this silvery-white light, symbolic for the astral Light.
Then i imagine sitting in a large temple in the form of a perfect cube. The floor has black and white tiles, like in a traditional Golden Dawn temple, and in the middle is the double cube Altar of the Universe, and between the Altar and the East stand the black and white pillars of Jakin and Boaz.
Then i imagine the walls of the temple colored in the colors of the respective forces, like for the cardinal signs red in the East, blue-violet in the South, green in the West and yellow-orange in the North.
To keep this posting short, i will only give an example for the creation of the Godform of Libra in the West, which is the egyptian Maat.
I stare at the green temple wall and imagine a portal opening in its middle, with red pillars on each side. Over the portal i can see the red glyph of Libra flashing on the green wall.
Then i vibrate the name of Maat for the first time and see that it takes shape for the first time between the pillars of the portal. I imagine the headdress (a feather), the dress, the lotuswand and ankh in her hands. Then i vibrate the second time and the shape of Maat gets more alive with color- a green dress with red trim, green and red egyptian-style jewelry around the neck and ankles, green nemyss with smaller red stripes and a feather on her head.
When i vibrate the third time, the details become more clear. I see her face more clearly, her make-up, the details of the jewelry and implements.
I vibrate her name the fourth time and imagine her becoming truly alive, seeing that she opens her eyes, seeing her chest moving with her breath etc.
Then i take my time and go through all the details again, mostly i start from the top, her head-dress, going down all her body to the feet.
Then i use the vibration formula of the Middle Pillar to enliven the God-Form ever more. I invoke Kether, bring a shaft of white Light to Tiphareth, vibrate the name of Maat there, bring it down to Malkuth, and up to Tiphareth again, where i once again vibrate her name, and then i project the name out of myself by giving the Sign of the Enterer, projecting a powerful shaft of white Light into the God-Form, and sealing it with the Sign of Silence. This will enliven the God-Form to the greatest extent.
Sometimes i also use my breath by imagining that i breath life into the form.
When it comes to assume it i first go the respective quarter and vibrate the name several times.
I imagine the form coming towards me, with its back before me. I concentrate on my Tiphareth center and softly step into it.
Then i imagine that my whole body turns into the God. I see myself dressed as the God, in the respective colors, having the jewelry and the head-dress on, also holding the implements.
When this is done sufficiently, i vibrate the name again for several times and give the Sign of the Enterer. When having done this, i imagine that i grow bigger and bigger, till i have the feeling that i truly AM the God, standing huge in the Universe, vibrating with power and grace.
I vibrate the name several times more, bringing myself in divine ecstasy, and finally i perform the Kabbalistic Cross to ground the feeling.
I view the assumption as succesful when having the feeling that iam really huge and vibrating with power, and feeling a flow of warm energy trickling through my body, like being bathed in warm golden sunlight.
Then i start to invoke the force with the respective pentagram, sings and names.
When the assumption is successful, the invocation itself usually takes not much energy.
I also amplify the invocation by imagining a current of light flowing through the invoking pentagram, saturating the God-Form with more life and power, and pouring through the Tiphareth center of the Form into my temple room.
To divest of the God-Form, i start to vibrate the name again, and with each vibration i grow smaller again and get more and more aware of my own body and personality, till i finally step out of the Form with the Sign of Silence, imagining the Form moving between the pillars of the portal in the wall again.
At the end of each invocation, after the Greater Banishing, i take my time to imagine the astral hall again, and reverse the process by imagining that the God-Forms in the quarters give the Sign of Silence and turn backwards and out of the Temple, the portals close, the colors fade, the walls fade and everything is filled with the silvery-white mist of astral Light again.
Then i perform the Lesser Banishings.

Ascetism and Sexuality

I've noticed that many novices and candidates for initiation think that ascetism is necessary for success in the magical arts and thereby busy themselves e.g. with not drinking alcohol anymore or suppressing their sexual drive. I think this is a mistake. On one hand it is surely healthy to stop wasting the body with poisonous substances like alcohol and tobacco, seeing that the body is the physical temple of the Lower Will and Higher Self.
On the other hand there arises a great danger of developing some sort of spiritual heroism or egotism, which may be a far greater sin than enjoying worldly pleasures from time to time.
One of the keywords to success in Magic is Balance. Amongst other things, this means to be moderate in all things human. One should neither practise vice, nor strict ascetism.
Especially regarding the sexual drive this is very important. I have heard from many students that they try to suppress it to the point of having no sex at all anymore, only to find themselves "tortured" by sexual dreams and obsessions.
There is the diffuse notion throughout the esoteric camps that the sexual drive has to be sublimated, that its energy has to be directed towards the higher chakras in order to reach enlightenment.
This may be true for some eastern practises, but surely not for hermetic Magic.
I think a healthy attitude towards sexuality is really necessary. To suppress sexuality over a long time can only result in obsession and perversion. A fact that the current scandals with german catholic priests can attest.
The sexual impulse is a creative expression of the Divine Life-force that saturates all the Universe, and as such it should be treated. To suppress sexuality means to deny this fact, and to contaminate it by unconsciously viewing it as something impure.
Instead we should consider sexuality, may it be straight, homo- or bisexual, as something sacred and rejoice when we have a partner with whom we can enjoy this sacred act of union.
Unfortunately the whole so-called sophisticated western civilisation is in a crooked situation in regards to sexuality. The media, at least in Germany, nearly explodes with sexual images. Sex sells everywhere, may it be in movies, fine arts or advertisements.
But at the same time i always get the feeling that sex still is viewed as something dirty, something that one has to be ashamed of.
Maybe iam over-sensitive to this fact because iam gay. You can find the mandatory gay couple in every soap opera on TV, but at the same time the teachers of every primary school confirm that "gay asshole" and "faggot" are the most used swearwords on the schoolyard. This is pretty sad.

But I want to come back to ascetism. I think Israel Regardie once wrote that many students of the occult fall into the trap of confusing the voice of their infantile ego with the voice of their Higher Self. To be more plain, many tend to think that "when i dont drink alcohol anymore or when i dont do this or that anymore, i will reach my Higher Self". I think this is not true. The Angel is not reached by good deeds or virtues, instead virtue is the outcome of communion with the Angel, but then virtues may have another connotation, and may not be measured by common moral standards anymore, instead taking on an alltogether different meaning.
Desires do not have to be suppressed, but instead purified. And purification means to analyse the true impact of every desire, seeing if it is necessary to fulfill it in order to be satisfied or if its just another escapist tendency.
Eliphas Levi once wrote that only he can enjoy the lust of love who has overcome the love for lust.
We all have to handle our saturnian appetites. In fact, we are all human and equipped with physical bodies that have certain appetites. We have to see that we dont overfeed them, but give them moderate nutrition.
When it comes to semiluxury food we have to see that we dont become slaves of our passions but instead become masters over our desires.
This may be a hard task, but its the only way to the golden palace.
The attitude of temperance in all things human is what distinguishes the hermetic path from the eastern paths. I think the roscicrucian claim that none of the posterity should be constrained to wear one certain kind of habit but therein to follow the custom of the country points in the same direction.
And also it is to be considered that the path that leads to Tiphareth is the path of Samekh, the path of Temperance, which is the straight and narrow path, and only few are able to find it.

In L.V.X.,
Frater L.e.N.e.

Sorry for the break

I know it has been a long time since i posted something here. Iam well aware that the longer i keep on pausing the greater is the danger that people forget about this blog.
The pause was not about laziness. I just had a lot going on in my life. Iam deeply involved in my grade work, temple work, tutoring students etc.
So if there is anybody out there who is interested in this blog, iam sorry, but i can assure you that i still want to work on it.

In Licht, Liebe und Leben,
Frater L.e.N.e.