Iam going through an incredibly tough time. All through the last year i had to face my inmost fears and sorrows. I had to face emptiness, boredom and chaos. I had to ask myself if iam trying to compensate my sometimes low self-esteem with success in magic. I felt like running in circles. I also felt like 8 years of practising magic led to nowhere, and questioned if i had chosen the right goals when "only" wishing spiritual attainment.
I indulged in vices that nearly brought me to the edge of ruin.
I also over and over asked myself why i do attempt to write at this dammit blog.
I cried so much during the last months like i never cried throughout all the last 8 years.
But: now i definitely know that all my eager and zealous invocations of the Highest have taught me one thing, and at least this one special thing, although this realisation had to come up with many tears and struggles: and this one thing is-----
COMPASSION. Compassion, that is understanding of and forgiveness for my own faults, and my own needs, and compassion for all human beings and their right to experience joy and freedom.
Sorry for sounding melodramatic this time, but emotion is a powerful force and it can teach valuable things at times.
My heart goes out to you, my dear friend.
AntwortenLöschenIn Licht, Leben und Liebe
S:.R:.
Dear Frater,
AntwortenLöschenI can feel your words and maybe I haven't had the exact same experiences, I also have tasted those tears sometime. I only encourage you to continue the path, and remember that we are being in constant trial, the trial by fire.
In the LVX,
VL
Dear Fratres,
AntwortenLöschenthanks for your kind words.
And no worries, there is no question of leaving the path, since this is a priceless jewel to me.
L.V.X.,
L.e.N.e.